I’ve often heard the saying not to compare your life to someone else’s highlight reel. While this has always been a bit of a problem because people will talk about the best of the best, but won’t talk about the long hard road it took them to get there, Facebook makes this even worse. You have friends that post every day about how wonderful their life is, how happy they are, how much they love their job, kids, spouse, life. That’s their highlight reel. It’s the best things that have and are happening in their lives.

When you’re wondering how your life compares, you cannot compare it to others’ lives. Instead, if you must compare your life, compare it to other points in your life. Do you like your job and wonder if you are doing well enough? Are you doing better than you did yesterday? Are you learning and practicing new skills every day? Have you improved your job skills since you started on that path? Are you happy today? Then you’re doing great. You have no need to compare it to anyone else.

Do you wonder how your kids stack up to others? You can bet that others are not sharing the gory details of why their kid is grounded, why they aren’t using their phone or are changing their passwords or why they are just not posting about their kids at all. Kids aren’t perfect. You can’t compare your “normal” kids to someone else’s “perfect”–or so they seem on social media–kids.

Wondering if your car compares to your friends’ cars? Does yours run? Does it get you where you need to go? Can you afford the payment (or better yet, is it paid for?), insurance, and maintenance? A big fancy car doesn’t make you a better person–it makes you a broke person. As long as it gets you from Point A to Point B, spend the money you’re not spending on a car to go to dinner or do something as a family.

And then, how’s your wardrobe? Is it Nordstrom or Target? Is it Stitch Fix or Goodwill? You can design clothes to make you look great. Of course, it’s easier with good quality clothes, but it is possible with just about anything. And honestly, do you think most people can even tell the difference? They’re not looking at the quality of your clothing, they’re looking at your style.

Just quit comparing. It is exhausting and doesn’t serve any good purpose. It makes you stress out trying to keep up with someone else. You should just be you and work to improve your own life and not worry about others. You have no control over them, so why are you comparing your life to theirs? Honestly, it doesn’t matter. Spend your time, money, and energy making you and your life better. Then when you make your own highlight reel, it will mean so much more to you.

I don’t take part in New Year’s resolutions because I never manage to meet those goals. I know that about myself and don’t want to set myself up for failure purposely, especially since I tend to do a lot of that accidentally. The one thing I do do is find my “word” each year. Here is my list for the past few years:

2016 – Promisekeeper – to remind me to keep the promises I made to myself. Promises like drinking more water, walking more, etc.

2015 – Choose – to remind me that I am in charge of the choices I make in my life.

2014 – Blessed – to remind myself to remember how blessed I am in my life.

2013 – Grateful – to remind me to be grateful for everything in my life–both good things and the things that teach me something.

2012 – Control – to remind me that I have control over the choices that I make–no one else, only me.

I usually visit Etsy and find a shop that does custom necklaces and choose what will work for that year’s word. Then I hang it from my car’s rear view mirror since that’s where I spend a lot of my “thinking” time. But there are so many options for ways to remind yourself–leave Post-It Notes with your word wherever you will see it throughout the day, write your word on the front of your journal and then use the word to spur your postings each day, write your word on your mirror with a dry erase pen, make a graphic with your word the background on your phone, or if you’re really enamored with your word and want to make it a lifetime word, get a tattoo!

It really does help to choose a word and then keep reminding yourself of your word to keep you on track. The word can be anything you want that means something to you and will motivate you. You can try it out for the rest of this year or plan to start fresh in 2017, but think about seeing how it will work for you and then let me know what word you chose and how you are reminding yourself of it.

You already know that you, and you alone, are responsible for your attitude all day every day. No one can force you to have a bad attitude–that is a choice you make. You can decide to let others bring you down, or you can decide that you, and you alone, have control over what has power in your life. I choose the latter.

Sometimes to help with that, I like to read or listen to motivational things–whether podcasts, daily readings, motivational quotes, daily motivating Facebook groups (they really do exist!), or another form of motivation. It really doesn’t take long to completely change your attitude if you will read or listen to things that truly motivate you and then take those words to heart.

It is empowering to know that something as important as your attitude is in your own hands. Especially since most days it seems like I am in control of so little in my life. My attitude, however, is completely under my control. I have to remind myself of that most days, but it is definitely true. And it definitely makes for a much better day!

Here are some of my favorite quotes:

“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new.” ~Dalai Lama

“When you have exhausted all the possibilities, remember this: You haven’t.” ~Thomas Edison

“Life is 10% what happens to you . . . and 90% how you react to it.” ~Charles R. Swindoll

“Don’t let anyone’s ignorance, hate, drama or negativity stop you from being the best person you can be.”

“Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds you down or polishes you up depends on you.” ~Jacob M. Braude

“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”

“Whatever you believe about yourself on the inside is what you will manifest on the outside.”

“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” ~William Shakespeare

What is your favorite motivational quote? Comment with it below.