One day closer to 60! So do I have more advice? You bet I do. Today I want to talk about love. Not just love and sex, but true love. Love is hard–all of it. Loving yourself (the MOST important love of all) is ridiculously hard. Just like they say on an airplane, you have to put your mask on before you can help others, you have to love yourself before you can give your love to others. Some people will think that you are conceited . . . love yourself anyway. Some people will bully you . . . love yourself anyway. Some people will ignore you when you are trying your hardest to be nice . . . love yourself anyway. As Dr. Seuss says “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” Every single day, you are the love that matters the most. If you love yourself, you can put up with a whole lot more crap than you could otherwise. Self love is kind of like a raincoat. It keeps your love inside to keep your heart warm and lets the crap that others sling at you slide right off. It certainly isn’t easy, but it is possible.

The love of family is also important. They are the people who should be there for you no matter what. That isn’t always the case, but when it is, it is amazing. They know all your secrets (and remind you of them fairly frequently), they know every single time you screwed up (and remind you of that too), and you know that you all have things in common that matter. As unlovable as they may be from time to time, keep loving them!

Once you meet your life partner and start building a family, your love changes. The nucleus of your heart becomes your family. You would do ANYTHING for them. Even as your spouse and children get older, your worries change, but they are still there. From worrying they will fall down while they’re starting to stand, to worrying that they will get hurt playing competitive sports, to worrying when they aren’t home at curfew and you swear every siren you hear is someone racing to them, worry is a form of love. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t worry.

And then come grandchildren. I swear I didn’t realize how much love my heart could hold until I watched the birth of my first granddaughter. As my son likes to say my heart “grew three sizes that day.” (He fancies himself quite the comedian.)

And through it all are friends. There will be much more on this topic later, but suffice it to say that I love my friends like they are my family because each of them throughout my lifetime (so far) has had a hand in making me who I am. And I kind of love that person!

Love is hard, but oh so rewarding! If you think that no one loves you, take a good long look in the mirror. THAT person is who matters most. Give him or her a kiss for me and then give him or her another one for you.

I love song lyrics and the stories they tell. There is a song that reminds me of today’s advice–Martina McBride’s song “Anyway.” If you haven’t ever heard it, check it out, and then go out and love people anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uLtyzRgmyI

Happy first day of Summer! It is hotter than blazes here, so I’m hoping days 2, 3, 4, etc. of Summer are much more “normal.” What is the Summer of 60? In 60 days I turn 60. It’s taken me a long time to be able to even say that. 60 is the age my grandparents were when they were really old. 60 is the age my parents were when I started thinking about the fact that they would actually not be here forever (even though I’m lucky enough that they still are). I’ve tried to think of ways to make it more palatable like the “40 is the new 20” craze. But somehow “60 is the new 45” doesn’t have the same ring and it just isn’t true (and I’m not sure I liked 45 any better). People tell me I don’t look 60 (which is, of course, awesome) but my body feels it–every single day. So now that I’m quickly approaching the sixth decade of my life, have I learned anything? I think I’ve learned a lot and feel a burning desire to share it with you. If you get one piece of inspiration from this Summer of 60, I will feel like my mission in writing it was worth it.

So a little bit about me and what I learned early on. I’ve been married for 42 years and have two children and seven grandchildren. My husband has owned his own business most of our married life and I have worked for basically two attorneys in my 35+ year legal career and as a secretary in construction companies before that. But we have had our share of tough times as a young family–wondering if the electricity would be shut off before we had the money to pay the bill, wondering if we would have enough food to last until payday, wondering if I would have gas money to make it to work all week. When I was on unpaid maternity leave with my second child, my husband missed his hunting trip because she was born the day he was supposed to leave. My dad took him hunting the next week and he got his prize deer. Since we had nothing else in the house to eat, I had to create different ways of cooking deer meat every night. The first night or two was OK, but every single night . . . I still can’t walk into a house where deer meat is cooking without feeling the bile in the back of my throat.

I know there are millions of people who live that life every day and I know as hard as it was for me, it was nothing compared to some. But it was still hard and we were lucky enough to overcome it. By hard work and a lot of juggling, we finally got to a place where regular paychecks for my self-employed husband made things much easier. Lesson 1 in this Summer of 60 is to keep working, keep believing, keep loving, and don’t give up. Life is hard, but I think not living is harder. I can’t imagine missing events in my family’s lives, weddings, graduations, celebrations. I just can’t imagine. Things will almost always get better. Since I have no control over your life, I can’t guarantee it will, but if you believe it will and you work hard, it should. And if it doesn’t, you’re still here and still amazing and that is worth celebrating. Let’s celebrate the Summer of 60 together starting NOW!